I have greatly neglected the ADHD arena on this blog. Those who know me will find that just a bit ironic, since I are one. So I’m bringing it up again now, but making it easier on myself by sharing a website that does an excellent job of covering a lot of ADHD-related territory.
If you don’t know FlyLady, I am happy to introduce you here. Find reassuring and practical advice for getting a handle on clutter, kindly developing habits that help you get and stay organized, and feeling better about yourself in the process.
The topic of “Saving Your Saturday” resonates with me because I, too, somehow grew up with the habit of postponing chores. For many years, I would tell friends at work that “this weekend I’m getting organized.” Someone finally said to me, “You said that last weekend!”
I received this private Facebook message in response to my ADHD post last week:
I wanted to send a private note about your ADHD article. It’s so great to read about basic goodness with acceptance of one’s ADHD! And thanks for being brave and putting it all out there. I was diagnosed with ADD inattentive type about 14 years ago. Currently I’m not doing medication as add doctors in my area are private pay and, together with my money issues, unmanageable to work with currently.
The struggle I’ve had and would love to read more about is how putting hours into mastering basic life management skills have drained away time I could spend being creative, but I never quite get there. I constantly worry about how no dralas will land in my studio apartment because of mess and how hopeless it is that they ever will with my organizational skills. I’m exhausted from doing simple cleaning tasks. Anyway, you know what I mean. Continue reading
Posted in ADHD, Shame
Nikki Kinser (Take Control Organizing) produces a helpful weekly podcast with encouragement and advice for the organized lifestyle. Here’s a recent episode:
“Fight the churn! You know it happens to you — you’re delighting in the act of moving things around all the while avoiding making the tough decisions that come with getting organized. But remember, just because it’s activity, doesn’t make it organizing activity. This week on the show, Nikki Kinzer and Pete Wright talk about rotation, making tough decisions, and donating the things that are ripe for a new home!”
There are two reminders I appreciated about this brief episode. First, it reminds me of the Buddhist definition of laziness, which includes busy laziness–activity that seems productive but doesn’t actually take us anywhere. It indicates a lack of awareness. It also points to a fear of facing something more challenging, like being in the moment with clarity.
Second, I enjoyed the reminder they briefly mention about clearing out clutter that is very old. If it’s so old we don’t even remember what’s in the box or binder, or on the hard drive or CD from 10 years ago–do we even need to look at it? We’ve moved past it, and it would only “churn” up old preoccupations to make ourselves go through every item. Sometimes the best idea is the swiftest action–just get rid of it. Shred it, toss it, or donate it.
Embrace it? Don’t we need to fix it?
I will be writing about the many aspects of having ADHD, and how to, yes, actually embrace it.
Labeling ourselves as ADHD is just one way of describing what we experience–and how others experience us. It is one way of getting a handle on what we struggle with. But the process of working with ourselves, and achieving what we want in life, can be a gentle one. Getting to know ourselves should always, always be a kind process, even if you discover patterns you wish to alter.
Posted in ADHD