Having the bravery to hug your partner can be a challenge in itself. Can you relax enough to give a hug that sends a message of unconditional friendship and caring, if not love? If you can, not only might it improve your relationship. It might actually be good for your own health.
Try it. At least twice a day (but with no maximum, as long as it’s welcome by your partner), hug for 10 seconds at least. Obviously, this isn’t the quick hi-and-bye kind of hug. It’s a full-body hugging-and-breathing exercise. See if you don’t feel better.
Another study explored the value of saying “we” more often when talking with your partner. Results in this study have some similarity to the hugging study – our blood pressure drops and we feel less stressed. Try to remember this in the next argument. If you tend to be too self-protective and self-justifying, this might be tough! At least don’t use “your” and “my” to hurt and score points in the argument.